And Here is Evelyn!

I send pictures like this to Forrest while he is at working saying "Evie misses you."
Then he  texts back and says, "I don't believe it when she's smiling like that."

So then I have to send him a picture like this.

And I just like this one because anytime we go to my parents' house,
Forrest ends up fixing something. He is such a handy man and a real trooper.

Neal A. Maxwell Once Said

"I have learned that not shrinking is more important than not surviving."

This is something I've thought a lot about in the last few years and tonight's CES devotional by Sister and Elder Bednar addressed a lot of my thoughts and feelings. I hope all of you get a chance to listen to it or read it at some point.

Here are a couple of other talks that I thought of while I was listening:

"But If Not" October 2002 General Conference
"Faith, Reason, and the Things of Eternity"
"The Lord Has Not Forgotten You" October 2012 General Relief Society Meeting

And just so you know, I know that not shrinking is more important than surviving. That developing faith in God, even if what you want is not what you hoped for, is everything. I know that the Savior can remove pain, burdens, temptations--everything. Even if he doesn't in every circumstance, I know that He can, because He has for me. And that is enough.

Perspective

Bruegel's Landscape with the Fall of Icarus

Ah, life. What a strange, strange thing it is. In the last 10 years I have learned two things. (Well, hopefully I've learned more than two...but these are the ones I've been thinking about lately.):

1. Life (circumstance, opposition, etc.) can hit me in the face, usually unexpectedly, and sometimes it hits me so hard I fall flat on my back. I wonder, "What just happened?" and "Why me?" and feel sorry for myself.

and then

2. Someone or something comes along and gives me a magical thing: perspective. It, too, feels like a slap in the face, but somehow it transports me back to my feet and I feel very foolish for ever letting life knock me down.

Recently, Forrest had some health issues that required hospital time and will require more care. And everything happened so randomly and unexpectedly and seemed so serious that I felt the way I just described in #1. Then, I spoke to a friend who had heard about the circumstance and she talked about some similar (and much worse) experiences her mother has endured her entire life. She wasn't trying to trivialize my experience. In fact, she, better than anyone, could empathize because of her experiences with her mother. And I appreciated it. But what talking to her really did for me was give me a dose of #2: perspective. And I was back on my feet again.

A few years ago, I became seriously disturbed by the fact that I knew so many who had very difficult circumstances in their lives--and not just one-time slaps in the face like the experience I had and described above--but lifelong burdens and difficulties that never seemed to go away. Or that had hurt them so deep that recovery seemed far away. I reflected on this for a long time, always believing that Heavenly Father loved His children and that the Atonement could heal all wounds and make up for any injustices, but not being able to reconcile that belief with the cold, hard facts: Some people's lives or trials seem so much worse and harder to overcome than mine. My issue wasn't that Heavenly Father allows His children to feel hurt and experience trials. I understand that these moments are what stretch us and can make us stronger and more like Him. My issue was why He let some people's lives or difficulties be so much harder or heavier than others. That didn't sit well with me. My life, compared to most of my friends, was so much happier and easier.

I studied and pondered for a long time about this. And then an answer came when I read the following words:

"But the test a loving God has set before us is not to see if we can endure difficulty. It is to see if we can endure it well. We pass the test by showing that we remembered Him and the commandments He gave us. And to endure well is to keep those commandments whatever the opposition, whatever the temptation, and whatever the tumult around us. We have that clear understanding because the restored gospel makes the plan of happiness so plain.

That clarity lets us see what help we need. We need strength beyond ourselves to keep the commandments in whatever circumstance life brings to us. For some it may be poverty, but for others it may be prosperity. It may be the ravages of age or the exuberance of youth. The combination of trials and their duration are as varied as are the children of our Heavenly Father. No two are alike. But what is being tested is the same, at all times in our lives and for every person: will we do whatsoever the Lord our God will command us?"

President Henry B. Eyring, "In the Strength of the Lord," April 2004 General Conference
(You can read or listen or watch the entire talk here.)

Almost instantly I felt an overwhelming peace. I had been looking at everything upside down. It is not our circumstances that are "the test." Circumstances are never equal. Circumstances "are as varied as are the children of our Heavenly Father. No two are alike. But what is being tested is the same, at all times in our lives and for every person: will we do whatsoever the Lord our God will command us?"

So though it may not outwardly appear so, my comparatively easy, happy circumstance is just as much a test as my neighbors' difficult, pained circumstance. If my easy circumstances keep me from turning to God, from relying on Him, then I am the one to be pitied, not someone whose world is crumbling around them but whose faith in God is unwavering. We get dealt different hands in this life. But we are expected to play by the same rules. What is being tested is always the same. And the Divine help to succeed and conquer all is available to every one of us. 

The Last Few Months

 The last few months have definitely been unique. We were so happy to be able to spend time in Allen for Thanksgiving and then again for New Years, and to spend Christmas in Frannie. It was so neat being able to see Ben and Ryanne and Nathan, Lindsay, and co who are normally half a world away, literally.

Forrest and Evelyn are so cute together. Anytime I am holding  Evie and her dad is home, she is always staring at him. We just can't get enough of him.

Unfortunately, Evelyn stopped sleeping her 7-8 hour nights while we were in Frannie, and hasn't  slept through the night since. I have a feeling she is going to need some serious sleep training in the next couple months. I wish Paula was here to help.

Grandma Roberts got this beautiful Christmas dress for Evie and she looked adorable--well, you can see for yourself.

Everyone who sees her says she looks like her daddy. She looks like Russell to me but I guess that's close enough to her dad. I just hope she keeps her blue eyes so that there is something that physically resembles me.

Forrest played around on his cell phone and found that he could take pictures in sepia.

The girl is sitting up in her bumbo and eating rice cereal!

She is the joy of our life basically.

Truth Restored

Gratitude

Flowers for Halloween

Blessing day with Papi (pronounce poppy-this is what comes from having a spanish-speaking sister and brother-in-law.)

Evie already loves being read to. She'll focus on each page and get big smiles on her face.

Blessing day with papa and nana Roberts.

And now for a wonderful talk by Joseph B.:

“Gratitude turns a meal into a feast and drudgery into delight. It softens our grief and heightens our pleasure. It turns the simple and common into the memorable and transcendent. It forges bonds of love and fosters loyalty and admiration.

Living in thanksgiving daily is a habit that will enrich our lives and the lives of those we love. But how do we make this part of who we are? May I suggest three things that will help as we strive to live in thanksgiving daily?

First, we must open our eyes.

Our minds have a marvelous capacity to notice the unusual. However, the opposite is true as well: The more often we see the things around us—even the beautiful and wonderful things—the more they become invisible to us.

That is why we often take for granted the beauty of this world: the flowers, the trees, the birds, the clouds—even those we love.

Because we see things so often, we see them less and less.

Those who live in thanksgiving daily, however, have a way of opening their eyes and seeing the wonders and beauties of this world as though seeing them for the first time.

[. . . .]

The second thing we can do is open our hearts.

We must let go of the negative emotions that bind our hearts and instead fill our souls with love, faith, and thanksgiving.

Anger, resentment, and bitterness stunt our spiritual growth. Would you bathe in impure water? Then why do we bathe our spirits with negative and bitter thoughts and feelings?

You can cleanse your heart. You don’t have to harbor thoughts and feelings that drag you down and destroy your spirit.

You can repent of uncleanliness. That is the miracle of Christ’s atoning sacrifice. You can become clean. You can cleanse your heart of impurity.

Begin the process today. Repent of those things you should repent of. Drink deeply of the living waters of the gospel. These latter days are a time of great spiritual thirst. Many in the world are searching, often intensely, for a source of refreshment that will quench their yearning for meaning and direction in their lives. The Lord provides the living water that can quench the burning thirst of those whose lives are parched by a drought of truth.

Pray with all your heart. Consider the love your Heavenly Father has for all His children. Open your hearts to His cleansing word. Feast on the words of holy writ. Cherish the messages of modern-day prophets and apostles. Forgive others who have offended you. Don’t waste another moment feeling self-pity. Every day drain from your heart the feelings of resentment, rage, and defeat that do nothing but discourage and destroy. Fill your heart with those things that ennoble, encourage, and inspire.

The great Book of Mormon prophet Nephi certainly had reason to be resentful. Hated by his brothers, bound and beaten and nearly murdered, he had plenty to be bitter about. After his father died, Nephi must have felt completely alone. He surely felt threatened. He surely felt discouraged. He surely felt troubled. But when it came time for him to communicate his feelings, what did he write?

Behold, my soul delighteth in the things of the Lord; and my heart pondereth continually upon the things which I have seen and heard. [2 Nephi 4:16]

Yes, his path had been difficult. Yes, his heart groaned because of mistakes he had made, but he did not allow himself to linger in negativity. Instead, he told himself:

Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul.

Do not anger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.

Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee. [2 Nephi 4:28–30]

The third thing we can do to live in thanksgiving daily is open our arms.

One of the best ways we show our gratitude is by blessing the lives of those around us. The great King Benjamin taught his people:

If you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, and has caused that ye should rejoice . . . —

. . . If ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants. [Mosiah 2:20–21]

And how do we render thanks unto God? King Benjamin told us that as well:

And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God. [Mosiah 2:17]

[. . . .]

Be grateful. Every day is a new canvas—a new opportunity. Our beloved President Gordon B. Hinckley has said:

My plea is that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I am suggesting that as we go through life, we “accentuate the positive.” I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generously compliment and endorse virtue and effort.[Standing for Something (New York: Times Books, 2000), 101]

Choice blessings await those who live in thanksgiving daily. “He who receiveth all things with thankfulness,” the Lord has promised, “shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more” (D&C 78:19).”

To read or listen to all of it you can click here.

27 Reasons Why

October 11th is a super dooper day in our house. So in honor of the man who makes October 11th special, here are 27 reasons why I think today is grand:

1. Without it, I would not have this handsome guy.

2. Without it, I would not have this beautiful girl.

3. It provides a perfect excuse to make a feijoada, fresh strawberry lemonade, and pumpkin chocolate chip cake.

4. It is always in the autumn.

5. The weather is always fine.

6. It is the perfect time for a celebration, ideally situated between my birthday and Halloween.

7. It is the reason I know what "play action" and "in the pocket" mean.

8. In fact, it is the reason I can now really enjoy this.

(Is anyone else terrified of Kyle Van Noy?)

9. It means having a best friend for life.

10. It i so easy to remember. 10/11. Not even I could forget that date.

And here are, last but not least , the other 17 reasons why I think October 11th is worth celebrating. (Not all 17 are present but there are twinkles in eyes...)

So Forrest Daniel Roberts, I can't really say it better than Gus Gus: