Lost Sheep

Today I am grateful that He seeks out and rescues lost sheep.

Pictures of One Terrific Toddler

It is amazing how Evelyn surprises us each day with something new she has learned to do or say. Her current vocabulary includes: mama, dada, cracker, georgia (her stuffed animal giraffe), stella (the cat), kitty, Jesus (she makes two 's' sounds and points to his picture). Her favorite word is dada. She says it all the time. She recognizes and responds to tons of other words: book, food, milk, hold on, go, stop, sleep, different parts of the face, etc. In the last two weeks, she finally learned to pull herself up, crawl, and get up from a sitting position. She folds her arms when it's time to pray. Her favorite books right now are But Not the Hippopotamus and The Very Hairy Bear. Her favorite foods are teddy grahams, choco-banana-pb shakes and grilled cheese sandwiches. She has quite a hefty appetite and has 6 teeth to chomp with. She falls at least 3 times a day. She likes watching The Sound of Music (I'm hoping this has the same effect as it did on her Uncle Russell...that she'll have an incredible singing voice). Any time music is playing, she either dances or waves her hand like a conductor. She loves to put on necklaces and bracelets and she loves, loves, loves being outside on our porch. Being a mom is the best.

At a park with some friends

Drinking a choco-banana-peanut butter shake with dad

Game Day Face

Mornings at the park with mom

My Friend Laura

Me, Caitlin, Laura, and Jen

So I have this friend named Laura. And today is her birthday so she has been on my mind. Since she lives in Utah and I live in Texas, I haven't seen her in far too long. So I just wanted to say a few words to her through cyberspace. I suppose I should just call, but I am not very good at talking on the phone (as she will attest).

Laura is the kind of person who is always one step ahead of you, but you don't resent them for it. You admire them and are grateful for it. She is the one who met and befriended everyone in the apartment complex by the end of week one -- and then suddenly I had friends too, because she included me in the festivities. She is intelligent, funny, and spontaneous. She is always picking up a new skill or honing an old skill -- biking, rock climbing, singing, violining, baking, writing -- seriously one of the most well-rounded people I know.

Did I mention how much I laugh when I'm around her? It is just enjoyable hearing her recount the events of her day because she always finds something funny about an conversation she's had or heard or something crazy she's seen.

We liked to play the piano and sing together sometimes, and she has this unbelievable voice. I don't even think she's had any formal training. It just comes out of her like that. I try not to be too jealous when I sound like Hilary Duff next to her Adele-ish voice, but....I am a little. We decided that one day we are going to do gigs at wedding receptions. I'll play the piano and she'll sing jazzy love songs in a black dress.

For awhile, every week we would get together and watch a random movie together.

Like this treasure:

Laura likes to quote that line to me sometimes..."Never had a good experience with an Ellen..." Bah! That's what I say to that Kirsten Dunst...

But seriously, Laura, I don't know what I would have done without you during my college days. You were my rock. So full of life and so fun to be around. Always spiritually grounded and ready to do whatever God wanted you to do, even when it didn't make sense at first. I've been around you and watched you for years and you constantly amaze me. Thank you for always caring. I hope this next year is the best so far. You deserve it. Happy Birthday! Here's a little number from Gavin Creel to ring in your new year:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3F7Wa0um3WY

Hace Calor!

So it is officially autumn. But it doesn't feel or look it here in Tejas. I'm speaking a little Spanish because while I was out with Evelyn on one or our daily outings to the mailbox, I started singing a little song from the my old Sesame Street watching days. It goes something like this:

Hace calor. Mucho calor! Could fry an egg on the cement it's so caliente.

Well I googled it today and found this YouTube video of it and, well--it just made me so happy. I hope it makes you happy too. They don't make 'em like this anymore...

This is what Evie and I sing as we walk in the staggeringly hot Texas weather and we hope that October will bring some Hace Frio!

Best Year of Our Life

A few months back, Forrest and I were at some friends' house for a birthday party and the couples there began to discuss what the best year of their life was up to the present. One of the individuals said something like, "It would definitely be before we had kids." 

And that was kind of sad to me. I understand the sentiment, of course. Having children limits or puts a strain on a lot: your free time, your budget, your time alone with your spouse, your ability to travel, and a million other things. But if that is the case, then all of my best years are behind me. That may be true for some people, I suppose. Forrest's response was that ideally each year should just get better than the previous one. And I like that. 

When I say, however, that this last year has been the best year of our lives, it is true and not just wishful thinking. For a plethora of reasons, this year has been full of wonder and fulfilled dreams and prayers. And a big part of that has been Evelyn. Because she is with us, we smile more, laugh more, sing more, read more, pray more, and try harder to be better than we are.

And now, for the pictures. 99% of people who look at Evelyn say immediately that she looks like her dad. Which is fine. Her dad is a handsome guy. But I kind of want her to have at least a little bit of Jenson in her. Then, the other day, I came across some pictures of me from when I was one and two years old. Looking at them reminded me that I look nothing like my baby pictures. And then seeing those pictures next to pictures of Evie proved that there is some Jenson in her yet!

Okay our eyes look completely different but that nose and
 half smile are unmistakable, right?

See! I can't see myself in this picture at all. But I can see a little bit of Evelyn in that face!

But there is no doubt she mostly favors her dad in the looks department. They are a good-looking pair.

 I love my baby and her dad.

Happy Father's Day!

We've been taking Evelyn swimming a couple of times a week--to beat the heat and prepare for our upcoming Roberts' Family Vacation in Florida. Woot! Woot! I just had to post this picture because both daddy and daughter look adorable. So happy to have them both.

For Memorial Day

Yes, we listened to "Proud to Be an American" and sang along today. And I just wanted to share these two videos because they left me reflective and thankful for so, so many things.

Grandpa Dean

My Grandpa Farnsworth passed away last week. I didn't know him personally very well while I was growing up. We never sat down together and had any conversations that I can remember, even though I spent a week every summer in his home almost every year of my life. But I got to know him better in the last five years of his life, when he lived with my mom and dad. He was so gracious and kind to them, even though it was so hard on him to be away from his hometown, unable to read or sing or play the violin and eventually unable to walk and converse the way he used. He never complained. I can't imagine what that would be like--to have such a full, talent-filled, friend-filled life. And then have age and circumstance and health slowly take everything away from you. But he handled it with dignity and kindness towards those caring for him. I thank him for his life devoted to serving God. I thank him for the mentor and teacher that he was to the students he taught and for the devoted husband and father he was to my grandma and my mother. I thank him for his love of literature, gardening, and music and his love of people of different races and cultures. My Uncle Kent posted some interesting insights into his life and travels on his website. It is a good read if you have the time.

Life with Evie

Our life has been so happy the last couple of weeks. I can't think of a better way to spend my day than to spend the mornings and afternoons with Evelyn and to spend my evenings with Forrest. We read, we sing, we dance, we play, we take walks, we clean the house, we cook, we read and sing some more...life is so, so good.

Evie loves to be outside and the weather has been gorgeous the last couple of days. (She is almost too heavy for the carrier, though. Soon it will be the stroller for her.) She kept those sunglasses on the first time we went out, but now she usually takes them off and plays with them while we walk. The bluebonnets are out and they are beautiful. 

Eating Paper. Her favorite food is rice puffs that she can now pick up and feed to herself.

She is a beast, let me tell you. She is 8 months old tomorrow and wearing 12 month clothes. 

I got her some hair bows so that she'd be even more adorable. If that's possible. 

Yes, yes it is.

And Here is Evelyn!

I send pictures like this to Forrest while he is at working saying "Evie misses you."
Then he  texts back and says, "I don't believe it when she's smiling like that."

So then I have to send him a picture like this.

And I just like this one because anytime we go to my parents' house,
Forrest ends up fixing something. He is such a handy man and a real trooper.

Neal A. Maxwell Once Said

"I have learned that not shrinking is more important than not surviving."

This is something I've thought a lot about in the last few years and tonight's CES devotional by Sister and Elder Bednar addressed a lot of my thoughts and feelings. I hope all of you get a chance to listen to it or read it at some point.

Here are a couple of other talks that I thought of while I was listening:

"But If Not" October 2002 General Conference
"Faith, Reason, and the Things of Eternity"
"The Lord Has Not Forgotten You" October 2012 General Relief Society Meeting

And just so you know, I know that not shrinking is more important than surviving. That developing faith in God, even if what you want is not what you hoped for, is everything. I know that the Savior can remove pain, burdens, temptations--everything. Even if he doesn't in every circumstance, I know that He can, because He has for me. And that is enough.

Perspective

Bruegel's Landscape with the Fall of Icarus

Ah, life. What a strange, strange thing it is. In the last 10 years I have learned two things. (Well, hopefully I've learned more than two...but these are the ones I've been thinking about lately.):

1. Life (circumstance, opposition, etc.) can hit me in the face, usually unexpectedly, and sometimes it hits me so hard I fall flat on my back. I wonder, "What just happened?" and "Why me?" and feel sorry for myself.

and then

2. Someone or something comes along and gives me a magical thing: perspective. It, too, feels like a slap in the face, but somehow it transports me back to my feet and I feel very foolish for ever letting life knock me down.

Recently, Forrest had some health issues that required hospital time and will require more care. And everything happened so randomly and unexpectedly and seemed so serious that I felt the way I just described in #1. Then, I spoke to a friend who had heard about the circumstance and she talked about some similar (and much worse) experiences her mother has endured her entire life. She wasn't trying to trivialize my experience. In fact, she, better than anyone, could empathize because of her experiences with her mother. And I appreciated it. But what talking to her really did for me was give me a dose of #2: perspective. And I was back on my feet again.

A few years ago, I became seriously disturbed by the fact that I knew so many who had very difficult circumstances in their lives--and not just one-time slaps in the face like the experience I had and described above--but lifelong burdens and difficulties that never seemed to go away. Or that had hurt them so deep that recovery seemed far away. I reflected on this for a long time, always believing that Heavenly Father loved His children and that the Atonement could heal all wounds and make up for any injustices, but not being able to reconcile that belief with the cold, hard facts: Some people's lives or trials seem so much worse and harder to overcome than mine. My issue wasn't that Heavenly Father allows His children to feel hurt and experience trials. I understand that these moments are what stretch us and can make us stronger and more like Him. My issue was why He let some people's lives or difficulties be so much harder or heavier than others. That didn't sit well with me. My life, compared to most of my friends, was so much happier and easier.

I studied and pondered for a long time about this. And then an answer came when I read the following words:

"But the test a loving God has set before us is not to see if we can endure difficulty. It is to see if we can endure it well. We pass the test by showing that we remembered Him and the commandments He gave us. And to endure well is to keep those commandments whatever the opposition, whatever the temptation, and whatever the tumult around us. We have that clear understanding because the restored gospel makes the plan of happiness so plain.

That clarity lets us see what help we need. We need strength beyond ourselves to keep the commandments in whatever circumstance life brings to us. For some it may be poverty, but for others it may be prosperity. It may be the ravages of age or the exuberance of youth. The combination of trials and their duration are as varied as are the children of our Heavenly Father. No two are alike. But what is being tested is the same, at all times in our lives and for every person: will we do whatsoever the Lord our God will command us?"

President Henry B. Eyring, "In the Strength of the Lord," April 2004 General Conference
(You can read or listen or watch the entire talk here.)

Almost instantly I felt an overwhelming peace. I had been looking at everything upside down. It is not our circumstances that are "the test." Circumstances are never equal. Circumstances "are as varied as are the children of our Heavenly Father. No two are alike. But what is being tested is the same, at all times in our lives and for every person: will we do whatsoever the Lord our God will command us?"

So though it may not outwardly appear so, my comparatively easy, happy circumstance is just as much a test as my neighbors' difficult, pained circumstance. If my easy circumstances keep me from turning to God, from relying on Him, then I am the one to be pitied, not someone whose world is crumbling around them but whose faith in God is unwavering. We get dealt different hands in this life. But we are expected to play by the same rules. What is being tested is always the same. And the Divine help to succeed and conquer all is available to every one of us. 

The Last Few Months

 The last few months have definitely been unique. We were so happy to be able to spend time in Allen for Thanksgiving and then again for New Years, and to spend Christmas in Frannie. It was so neat being able to see Ben and Ryanne and Nathan, Lindsay, and co who are normally half a world away, literally.

Forrest and Evelyn are so cute together. Anytime I am holding  Evie and her dad is home, she is always staring at him. We just can't get enough of him.

Unfortunately, Evelyn stopped sleeping her 7-8 hour nights while we were in Frannie, and hasn't  slept through the night since. I have a feeling she is going to need some serious sleep training in the next couple months. I wish Paula was here to help.

Grandma Roberts got this beautiful Christmas dress for Evie and she looked adorable--well, you can see for yourself.

Everyone who sees her says she looks like her daddy. She looks like Russell to me but I guess that's close enough to her dad. I just hope she keeps her blue eyes so that there is something that physically resembles me.

Forrest played around on his cell phone and found that he could take pictures in sepia.

The girl is sitting up in her bumbo and eating rice cereal!

She is the joy of our life basically.

Truth Restored